tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58304768147019614962023-11-15T06:06:36.500-08:00THIS IS METHIS IS ME, This is The Real Me, The One Who Need Help, Need Life Insurance, Please Help Me God, Anyone Help Me Please, This Is My Life StoryJaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-51824806835941630882010-05-13T19:20:00.001-07:002010-05-13T19:26:14.467-07:00I refuse to give my life to fate<a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, the one who always try anything just to survive and make everyone I love and I care happy. I know it's not easy to do but I don't want to give up to fate even some times the fate is really cruel thing that crush me all the times. but even that fate broke my arms, I will try with my legs, when that fate broke my legs too, I will keep try with my head and when the fate crush all my body, I will keep trying with my spirit, everything I have.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">I refuse to give up or surender my life to fate</span>, because I believe if we want to change, we must be can change.<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-36475364421590331172010-05-05T20:26:00.000-07:002010-05-05T20:29:12.725-07:00I want to be like Muhammad Rasulullah sawin the last few days I really try to learn hard, may be hard than before I ever learn something that because <span style="font-weight: bold;">I want to live like Rasulullah saw</span>. and I hope I can do that. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, <span style="font-style: italic;">the one who want to be like Muhammad saw</span> and I hope Allah will help me for that.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-50491755875397563622010-04-29T20:12:00.000-07:002010-04-29T20:23:59.397-07:00Help me Pleaseto any one who read this, or maybe you are the generous one, please help me, because almost 7 years I have to face the same problems and all of its because of money. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, the one who start to do business with borrow some money from other people. honestly the business doing well but when the needs is more and more push me, I can't do nothing beside doing the best I can do to survive. with all the limitation I have and the needs I have to fill, I'll try to run this life carefully. but it's not enough, because my energy is run out just to survive so I can not move forward and make my business growth, and now I have to face that I can't fill what I needs anymore.<br /><br />maybe I have to explain what the needs to all of you. I have to pay the loan money to the bank which is I used to keep my business survive, then I have to pay all the bill such as electricity, phone and school insurance for my daughter, we have to eat too, so I need to spend some money to buy the basic needs such as rice and foods. I have to pay my only employee and now I really looking for someone who want to help me give me The Money Loan for me.<br /><br />If you really want to help me, I'm in Indonesia and here is my phone numbers : 021-32498331, thanks.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-45387441965074732622010-04-26T20:15:00.001-07:002010-04-26T20:19:33.254-07:00Is the Credit Loan is come today?When I wake up this morning, I heard some "Good News" for myself about the Loan Credit, because I really need to Loan Money but it seems to hard because I don't have any guarantee for it. I hope this time is for real, because this is will affect to my life, my future and of course my way to find my dreams.<br /><br />To all friend who already helping me, thanks a lot, and may Allah bless you. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and I really thanks for that.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-30848673919054385262010-04-25T21:04:00.000-07:002010-04-25T21:06:50.219-07:00I will Keep HopeI know, desperate is not the answer for me, and <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, the one who willing to fight until the end of this life and I will keep hope and try until that chance is coming, mean while I must maximize every opportunity that I have to keep survive. even I know it's really hard to be patient but I have to, for everyone I love in this world. I only hope that Allah will help me soon when I still breath and standing.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-75772863834653205322010-04-20T20:48:00.000-07:002010-04-20T20:50:22.929-07:00The Chance has arrivedFinally there is some hope comes to me today and I hope I can manage and make it very valuable because maybe this is one of the important opportunity in my life. I hope I not waste this chance and I really thanks for it. Thanks God and thanks for this opportunity, I hope I can maximize this one.<br /><br />To everyone who help me all this time, <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, and I thanks for it.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-25373846345065171022010-04-18T22:56:00.000-07:002010-04-18T23:00:34.528-07:00No Chance No FutureI'm tired to wait something never comes, is it me the one who too foolish and stupid or just too naif to face this life? all I want is just a big chance for me a chance that will change my life, is it too difficult or is it too big what I'm asking for? Ya Allah, is it me too meaningless or not worth for You to give a chance?<br /><br />this time I really doesn't know what is wrong or right? I really don't know. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, the one who lost the direction and there is no longer future in my life.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-881946229272390842010-04-15T23:31:00.001-07:002010-04-15T23:36:30.251-07:00Save our Earth and all the beauty from this natureWhen I see the beauty of nature that <b>Allah</b> give to us, I realize that we already been bless by Allah because with all the beauty in this earth we can live and breath without having any trouble. but once again we do not know how to thanks for that, we destroy the nature only for temporary advantage and because of our selfish the nature is now dying.<div><br /></div><div><b><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/">This Is Me</a></b>, I'm the one who really care about the nature even I only do the minimum thing, at least I already did something. do you ever think someday this earth will be empty without trees or any living thing inside? that's all because what we doing today, make the nature broken without don't know how to fix it.</div><div><br /></div><div>so, <b>Save our earth immediately</b>!</div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-78518287863803004422010-04-12T21:54:00.000-07:002010-04-12T21:56:23.475-07:00It's hard to find Money Loan<a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and today I don't have anything to said because I really confuse now, it's really hard to find <span style="font-style: italic;">Money Loan from any Bank</span> or anyone. Is anyone will help me loan me some money?Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-80239165436642781792010-04-08T08:40:00.000-07:002010-04-08T08:48:22.540-07:00Allah always be there for usThis is wonderful, this is miracle for me. That's why we can't stop hoping and pray begging for help to <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> and believe me, <span style="font-style: italic;">Allah</span> will help us in anyway <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> want and we never think if there is any kind of the way to help us from the problem we had. and that's what happen to me and I never stop to said thank you <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>, thank you, <span style="font-style: italic;">alhamdulillah</span>.<br /><br />Sometimes we don't know what <span style="font-style: italic;">Allah</span> give to us is good, sometimes we only see the whole physically or something we see but we never think what's behind it? that's human thinking and there is nothing wrong about it but at least that can make us more wise and learn something from our mistaken.<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and I've been there for a lot of times and finally I learn something precious in this life, which is never give up and never stop hoping to <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> because <span style="font-style: italic;">Allah</span> who made us and <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> know what is the best for us.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-61384001517439802762010-04-03T20:42:00.000-07:002010-04-03T20:49:45.406-07:00I'm with my daughterToday I've been companion by my daughter when I made a posting in the village using other internet connection in my new rent house. even inside my mind I think of how about to pay all the bill of this month but inside my heart I feel so happy and glade because of my daughter is beside me and make me feel so comfortable.<div><br /></div><div>Maybe not only just money and wealthy, it's about love and caring. maybe there is so many people with a lot of money and very wealthy but they can't feel what is love and care and I'm very thanks to <b>Allah</b> that I've been bless with it.</div><div><br /></div><div>so <b><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/">This Is Me</a></b> and today I just so happy</div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-35261769144108038922010-04-02T02:49:00.000-07:002010-04-02T02:55:18.718-07:00I Finally Found AllahI finally found what should I do with my new blog and I like it and I hope everyone like it too and <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and I will always be remember <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">Muhammad</span> because <span style="font-weight: bold;">I love Allah</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">I love Muhammad SAW</span>. and this is what I want for the rest of my life which is love <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">Rasulullah</span> because I can't live without <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">Rasulullah</span>.<br /><br />and <span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span>, and I finally found my way to live in this world and the next life and I hope <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah </span>will always bless me and I can follow what <span style="font-weight: bold;">Muhammad SAW</span> way. Thanks <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> for everything that you've been give to me and in the future. and I know You always help me all the time. and <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> the one who found the way for the rest of this life.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-70683204963679575592010-03-30T18:46:00.000-07:002010-03-30T19:00:31.206-07:00Allah will always Help Me<a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> now try to be a better blog with new looks and templates and I hope anyone who visit this blog will get something from it and I believe all the articles I made probably happen in other people life on only me. and <span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span> who always tell the truth about me and the way I feel and how do I solve all the problems just to survive in this world with all the insurance from Allah.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Bismillah</span>, that's the word who always comes from me when I want to do something it's mean with the name of Allah I will do the job and hope <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> will bless me with that. I just want to continue with the post that I've been made few days ago when I feel so desperate because with the money I have this month I can't pay any bill not mention bill for <span style="font-style: italic;">my daughter School Insurance</span> and that's make me really desperate, lost hope and it's collide inside my heart becoming one big problem.<br /><br />For someone who has a lot of money maybe they do not have to think how about the next month, can I pay this, can I pay that, <span style="font-style: italic;">can I fill my life insurance</span> and anything, because they has money, unlike me. I have to work very hard to live my family with all the limitation I have, education, ability and equipment. but after I have few minutes for meditation, hear the sound of nature and begging help to <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>, I realize that we live in this world is only for temporary not forever and from all the problem inside me, I made the conclusion which is I should never give up because there is a Big Power from <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> who always help me all the times if I believe and I believe to <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>.<br /><br />want to know the result, just keep following <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> because I will write more about <span style="font-weight: bold;">How Powerful Allah</span> is and How?Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-43961677705249141452010-03-29T22:34:00.001-07:002010-03-29T22:42:47.691-07:00Never Give Up in This Life<div style="text-align: justify;">Yesterday when I just got back from the village to meet my daughter, I have "consumer" who talk too me much and what he talking to me is make my spirit is rise again. after he ask me about how to become writer on the internet we have conversation and from the conversation I know that "old man" is a <span style="font-weight: bold;">wise man</span> and he told me much about his life.<br /><br />he told me that we should <span style="font-weight: bold;">never give up in this life</span> because when you give up you don't have a chance to bring your life back to the top even is very hard but just don't give up, keep your hope alive and never give up. keep trying and trying and don't forget to praying ask for God help because our life is belong to Allah and Allah decide everything according to our mind and our feeling. if we think we can not do something, believe me we will never can do that thing, but if we tough we can do it, believe me it will find the way and that will be realize.<br /><br />almost few hours we talk and I finally learn something which is <span style="font-weight: bold;">we should never give up</span> even we in the hard situation but we should never give up from hope and keep trying and trying and don't forget asking for help to Allah. that what I can learn from the conversation between the old man and me. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and I hope We <span style="font-weight: bold;">Never Give Up in this life</span>.<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-83826738835487494642010-03-28T22:25:00.000-07:002010-03-28T22:49:45.970-07:00Don't Ever Doubtful AllahAssalamu'alaikum Wr. Wb.<br />Bismillah<br /><br />When someone already reach the bottom of their life, the situation who can make anyone do something out of their mind, crazy or even kill themselves only because they can not figure it out what is wrong with them? and that happening to me, to myself and <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">this is me</span></a> want to share all of it on this blog.<br /><br />in Friday in my mind, inside my brain is full with disappointment and anger, but to whom? to me, to someone or to the <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>? and what is my right to angry with? so I'll try to make myself thinking and thinking what is wrong with me and my life all this time? I think I've done everything the best I can do, even I already "pray" but why there is still no change with me and my life and that make more depress and lost my idea.<br /><br />Finally I have the conclusion of myself which is all this time I've done something because I want something in return, not because of that was is my responsible or I think I already do because of my responsible and not hope something in return but the fact, the way I do, the way I think is different, inside my heart I still want something in return not because that what I have to do without thinking what is the return for me, and that's the beginning of the mistaken I've done.<br /><br />as a Moslem I have to think the way I've been told on <span style="font-weight: bold;">Holy Qur'an</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">Sunnah Rasulullah SAW</span>. and all this time I just ignore them and just do and do without knowing the direction of this life. I realize that I believe in <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> but what I do, I act and I think is different. I'm still questioning myself about <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>, is <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> will help me, is that right or no, and the worst is I think there is no more hope for me because <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> will not help me.<br /><br />But all of those mind now I'll try to remove from this head, this heart and this life. Because when you believe <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> then you have to trust <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> fully not half or quarter, and that is not an option. the way you think, you do, you act you talk is because you believe <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> and <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> teach you on <span style="font-weight: bold;">Holy Qur'an</span>. Believe is one thing very hard to do but when you already do that that's the first step you've been made to continuing.<br /><br />So, no matter what your problem is just return it to <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>, because all the key of the problem is belong to <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> and we have to ask <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> to solve the problem and of course there is the rule to do that and I will explain that in the next chance, <span style="font-weight: bold;">insya Allah</span>. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and once you believe <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>, don't you ever doubtful <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> because the way we think is what <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> give to us. Thanks to visiting and hope <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> will bless all of us.<br /><br />Alhamdulillah.<br />Wassalamu'alaikum Wr. Wb.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-27869122884294249472010-03-26T20:23:00.000-07:002010-03-26T20:33:15.216-07:00Please Forgive me Everyone and Forgive me Godmay be this will be the end of my life! next week maybe I will fall in to the deepest failure I ever had in my life and all of it because my mistake and my foolish way to make decision in the past. I'm not sure if I can pass this again, because everything is not going right just failure and mistaken in front of me, not mention I don't know how to pay all the bill for this month. maybe only miracle who can save me now, God? may be God already disappoint to me much so I don't know to whom I begging for help.<br /><br />So I will enjoy the rest of my life for few weeks and even is the last week of my life but I have to share it with all the one I love and I care about. so God please forgive me for the the mistaken and sin that I made and don't make everyone I love is suffering because of my fault. let me carry this by myself because this is the mistaken that I've been made not them.<br /><br />To everyone I love <span style="font-weight: bold;">please forgive me</span> and don't hate me especially for my wife and my daughter, forgive me because I can't make your life better and I can only make you all suffer. thanks for everything that you have been give to me God and once again <span style="font-weight: bold;">Please Forgive me</span>, thank you.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-87658093961142544732010-03-23T19:35:00.001-07:002010-03-23T19:41:31.214-07:00I'm all Yours Allah<div style="text-align: justify;">I'll try to keep this hope alive inside my heart even in the same time my heart is feel so afraid, how if I can through this? what should I do? but I'll try to make myself strong and believe to Allah, that Allah will give the best for me. and only that thing in my mind who keep me alive and I know Allah always see me all the times.<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: justify;">I always pray to <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span>, <span style="font-weight: bold;">Ya Allah</span>, please help me through this situation, please give me the best from You to me, the one who really need Your help, Your bless and Your love, please don't leave me alone, don't punish me, forgive me and <span style="font-style: italic;">help me to make my dream comes true</span>.<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and I always believe that <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> will help me all the time, because <span style="font-weight: bold;">my life, my dead is belong to Allah</span>.<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-62979089249814040302010-03-22T19:16:00.000-07:002010-03-22T19:26:29.759-07:00This Is My Way to Turn Back AgainI think <span style="font-style: italic;">I found my way</span> back again "maybe", but I've been through this way and almost six months I've been there I feel peace and relax of course it's not the easy way to go but I should try and comeback to that way. I already think this decision again and again, and the result is still the same, which is I should back to the way I ever feel so peaceful and comfortable even that's not easy but I think I can do that.<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and I believe <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is My Way</span></a> to wake up again to see the world with different view with all the limitation that I have I will pass this again but maybe I have to work harder and harder. Because I think the right way is when we feel we match with it why we have to avoid it why don't we just through that way beside I already know what will come on the cross of that way.<br /><br />When I still work on the Textile Factory I ever learn even through this way and I feel so great and peace but some how I turn back and leave that way, now after thousand time thinking I decide to comeback and try again from the beginning. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, may <span style="font-weight: bold;">Allah</span> help me and always be with me all the time.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-21707408986208796752010-03-21T23:53:00.000-07:002010-03-22T00:07:18.105-07:00More Tested to Me from God, Hope I will surviveOnce again my patience was tested, maybe it seem not hard enough so there is some test anymore in my life in the right time. when I want to see my family I have surprised with my daughter condition who has fever, almost two days my wife said my daughter has this fever. this maybe classical reason but we even can get my daughter to the doctor to cure her because of we don't have any money to do it.<br /><br />Not mention maybe this month I don't have good earning so we have to use the money wisely, we can not spend our money too much, because we afraid is not enough until next month. I believe my wife will understand with the situation, when my store is not too much visitor also with my blog, not too good with earning, but I keep the hope alive because only hope that we have now.<br /><br />I try to find a side job to increase earning for us, but until now I still don't have any answer or way to it but as husband and father I will keep try and try because they are my responsibility and I can't let them down because of my disability. may Allah help me and find me a best way to comes out from this situation. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> the one who need comes out from the situation who always been become my nightmares.Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-34495799869595799822010-03-19T20:12:00.001-07:002010-03-19T20:23:25.946-07:00Where is The Light<div style="text-align: justify;">Just dark, black inside my mind, there is no clue or anything to make me move ahead or step forward. I need a light even there is only light of the candle at least that light can bright this mind and continue to move forward even it's not easy but I have to move on, fight back. But I can't see, I can not see anything right now, it's dark here and I just like blind man in this world. and those are some describe from me which drawn what inside me and <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>.<br /><br />For years I looking for some light to bright my way so I can move easily forward, I'll try turn left, turn right or even step backward just to find those light but I can not found it, or me too blind not seeing what I've been missed. maybe those light right in front of me but I just too long not to see so feel just like blind and maybe when the light is come I fallen to sleep because too tired looking for it. damn, what an unlucky man, my heart is whispering to my head.<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, believe me I will never stop to find that light to make this way easier so I can move on and step forward in this life. I will never regret everything that I've been sacrifice for it, but I will never accept the foolish that I've been made all this time, fall to sleep when that light is coming to me.<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-75036731498751633252010-03-17T01:21:00.000-07:002010-03-17T01:37:23.246-07:00The Best I can do for the one I love<div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and this is the real me. After my store contract is no longer available, so I decide to move to other place or my friend internet cafe precisely, I stay at the internet cafe for a while, until i can get the money to rent my own store. thanks there is still a good friend of me accept me to stay there and give the place to live even only for a while.<br /><br />If i can give any of my energy or my tough to my friend not money because i don't have any money, i will give it to pay the debt to him. until now still i can't have found the way to my dreams and i think i have to work very hard for it and keep going until my breath is over, til i die. and when that day not come yet, i think i have to force everything i had to reach this dream.<br /><br />I'm not young anymore, i almost 36 years old now but i believe when you have a will there must be a way you can find to reach your dream. and i will make this dream come true even i have to pay with my life. <span style="font-style: italic;">for the one i love, my daughter, wife, family</span>, i want to make them proud to have someone like me and can make sure of they <span style="font-style: italic;">life insurance</span> and i believe i can do, can i?<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">this is me</span></a> the one who keep fight and fight for the rest of my life to find a better life<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-78365618614501806122010-03-14T21:13:00.000-07:002010-03-14T21:24:26.414-07:00How do I pay all Bill and My Daughter School Insurance?<div style="text-align: justify;">I think I already mess up everything in this life. and this month I don't know <span style="font-style: italic;">how to pay my electricity bill, water bill, my daughter school insurance</span> and also monthly money for my family so my wife can buy something to eat for us. I don't know what way should I take to change this faith to be a better one, because the whole way I know I've already try and the result is still the same, even getting worst every times.<br /><br />What I need is luck and chance, big chance. with my skill which is fix computers and typing, I can only wait because I don't have money to buy some part such part of computer thing and also I don't know from where I have to search it. may be I'm quiet lucky still alive today, because yesterday me and my wife just talking a long day about our future and how will be our life in the next few days, few months? should I give up? <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and I don't know how to make this life is to be better, if I know, I would never write this blog, just to express myself through this written.<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, I hope there will be a <span style="font-weight: bold;">better ways and better chance</span> in the next few days so I can tell the good news to my family that we can pay the bill again and continue this life again. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a> and the real me, no more no less.<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-8168324814668271972010-03-08T18:53:00.000-08:002010-03-08T19:07:01.514-08:00Is anyone or anything will help Me?<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-weight: bold;font-size:180%;" >????</span><br /></div>That marks always inside my head all the times. Is me to stupid to understand all this life and understand how to live in this world? can I continue this life? or what should I do with all my job, my duty and my obligation to the God, parents, family? honestly, I never think about myself, because I run this life to fill my obligation and if there is something for me in return, I'll thanks for that.<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, someone who always looking for something to make a better life, a better thing to fulfill everything what the one I love needed. But until now I always let them down, I never can keep my promise, I always promise them to be have a better life in the future and be patience for that, the reality say very different thing to me. How can I carry on again?<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, the one who want to try every ways that I can do, only to make obligation complete in this world. maybe if I'm death, I'm free from that obligation. Sorry to all the one I love, I can't make all of you happy, I can't make my promise comes true. to my parents, to my wife and daughter, please forgive me, because This Is Me, this is the best I can do for you all, no more, no less. I'm tired, I'm really tired, I wanna take a rest from this life for a moment.<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>! Is possible someone or something will help me? looks like a dead end is very close in front of me and I can't figure it the way out from there. This Is Me! PLEASE..... ANYONE HELP ME! I already try the best I can do, what should I do now? what should I do? God? I think God doesn't want to hear me, because there is too much sin and I do bad in this life, I think I'm finish now. This Is Me, but thanks to everyone who supporting me all this time and I really mean it. Thanks!Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-90331533039532683472010-03-04T18:16:00.000-08:002010-03-04T18:26:06.925-08:00I'm a Bad Luck Man and This Is the Real Me<div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This is Me</span></a>, the one who always have a bad luck in this life. Such as this month, I have to move to other place to survive this life and hope a better thing will happen to me, because I don't have any money to continue pay the rent for my store. So the way out is, I have to move and for temporary I rent a place from my friend, even it's too little but I have to continue other wise I can't earn anything to live my life.<br /><br />After few days I move to new place, I know it would be hard to adapt again but I wasn't predict this hard. In the night often I cry in my heart and begging help from God and anyone who can help me. may be I'm too stupid by hoping help from the others and also I'm too naif to has a dream in this life.<br /><br />Should I quit and runaway from all this problems? should I? who will pay for my family life insurance and my daughter school insurance? I keep think and think but there is nothing, in my head running out of idea and I think I'll die for sure. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This is Me</span></a>, can someone, something help me?<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5830476814701961496.post-81120708382413741882010-03-03T20:52:00.000-08:002010-03-03T21:06:19.902-08:00Better Life Better Future Better Opportunity<div style="text-align: justify;">After what I see the whole thing that happen to me, I believe there is must be something wrong with myself, and I have to figure it out soon. <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, I have to know what happen to me and what will I do with my life. Even I know, it's really hard to do that, but I have to fight and work very hard fot it.<br /><br /><a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, I have to run my life according from what I'm learning all this time, there is no easy life for me, so I need to make my ability to survive more than anyone else who have the same faith with me, if I want to succeed in this life. I have responsible to do and I have family, and they are one of my reason I'm alive.<br /><br />And today I know there is a way in front of me that I have to use wisely without throwing that opportunity away. <span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span>, I control my life, not anyone else, so I have to clear the destination in my life for better future. and <a href="http://thisis---me.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-weight: bold;">This Is Me</span></a>, the one who find big opportunity or create my own opportunity to make a better situation for me, for my family, friends, nations and this earth.<br /></div>Jaya Laksanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16906164853524748155noreply@blogger.com0